Using Life to Learn Valuable lessons

Our family took a journey this week that was very emotional.  A little excitement, a lot of anxiety, and the end result...peaceful sadness. In the midst of it all, we also gained extraordinary knowledge for when we bring home the child God has called to our home.  I don't want to rehash the whole event, because even though we are at peace with the final decision, there is still some sting that is making it difficult to hit the ground running again.  But, God will build our momentum and the adoption journey will proceed right on time.

This week I felt like I became even more prepared and empowered as an adoptive mom to be.  My husband and I learned a bit more on how to lean on one another, pray hard together, and be willing to admit when we are supposed to just be still and know that God is God.

I also got to see why God told us very early in this adoption journey, that we are NOT allowed to build this wall alone (Read Nehemiah Chapter 3 or go to my initial post to understand).  I had 3 wonderful ladies by my side, giving Godly counsel (Thank you Tracy, Jillian, and Becky) and praying with me every step of the way.  They presented the good, the bad, and the indifferent, no matter how hard it was to hear.  They wanted what was best for our family and to help us figure out what God's plan was in this leg of the journey. I have no clue how people ever do this adoption journey without having people to turn to. God has created a mountain of resources and contacts along the way and I am so blessed for it. I look back at the day that we started this journey and it seems so long ago, because we've come so far from the state of loneliness we were in during the beginning.  When I don't know something God gives me just the right person to help fill in the gaps.

I've learned through this part of our journey that love has no limits, not even in adoption. But, love also means sometimes making the more difficult choice. God means it when he says he will not leave or forsake you.  And I learned that whatever child we are blessed with, he will have some hardcore advocating parents.  We will stop at nothing to be sure he has everything he needs to be very successful in life. So I gained strength and knowledge...two things no one can ever take away from me and that can never be wasted.

I also got to spend some time with my husband this weekend and do a spiritual temperature check on my marriage. It was an amazing time. We attended The Art of Marriage conference this weekend hosted by our awesome Marriage and Family duo.  We had a chance to see how far our marriage had really come.  There was a time when many of the questions asked would have been easy to answer, because we hit every marriage issue checkoff in the book.  But this weekend, we got to see how investing in God and our marriage had really transformed it.  It had been transformed so much, that it was difficult to pinpoint real struggles in our marriage.  Don't worry...we have them (our communication skills still lack a little luster), but they no longer carry the damaging effects that would create a horrible legacy for the future of our children.

We now have a marriage that I am proud for my children to see.  We have a marriage that we hope they will model their own marriages after to some extent and prayerfully they will have an even better start, because their marriages will be an extension of the blessings from ours...meaning they can take their lives and marriages even further than ours.  And then they will pass on an even better legacy for their children and grandchildren.

I got to spend time reminding myself why I appreciate the man I married and why he is my beloved. I got a chance to reflect on the things I can do daily to improve my marriage even more. And I reaffirmed that no matter how stupid the world around me thinks I am for being the type of wife and woman I am...my marriage and life prove otherwise. I am bearing the fruit from the seeds God has planted in my heart and in my marriage.  Ben and I accepted the call a while ago to be generational legacy changers. Here's to the next generation.

This week has been faced with some serious challenges, but it has been covered with beauty, grace, and love as well.  I thank God for even the hard things in life, because in the end I am better for them.  My marriage was once a hard place, but it is a thing of beauty. That is proof enough for me that God will use our bad for his good as long as we make room for him to do so.  

 "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,^[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, ³ because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance."  James 1: 2-3

~Queen Bee